Korea is a very modern country in many ways, such as the availability of high-speed Internet and wi-fi, the ubiquity of coffee joints, and Starcraft addiction. In other ways, such as the treatment of women, they aren't quite there yet. On any given night there's a chance you'll see a vitriolic argument between a very inebriated man and his girlfriend. These can escalate to a level of shouting that would, in America, result in the man being wrestled to the ground by concerned onlookers. In Korea, everyone seems to ignore it or chuckle at it.
As foreigners, this puts us in an extremely awkward position. The arguments usually don't turn violent, but I think the combination of two seemingly contradictory viewpoints - our "women as equals" mentality and our John Wayne "save the girl" mentality - drives us to intervene. If it were to turn physical, however, we'd be at an extreme disadvantage in a court of law, given our poor command of the language and the anti-foreigner mentality of some people, who would love to deport an English teacher.
Last night though, a man crossed the line. We were having some wine at a convenience store and some drunk started shouting at the woman he was with. She was giving as good as she was getting, so he picked up the table by the umbrella and started vaguely threatening her with it. At this point they decided to leave, and he grabbed her by the hair. I stood up and shouted at him - he surely didn't understand me - and started looking around me for backup. I was 99% sure I could take the guy but I was concerned that Soju may have rendered him impervious to pain. Also, having some Koreans on my side couldn't hurt if the police got involved. Naturally, everyone just sat there waiting to see what the white kid was going to do.
They turned a corner and we thought we heard slapping sounds so I decided "f*** this" and shoved him away. He suddenly became very apologetic, as did she; "sorry" may have been one of the few English words they knew. Of course, NOW all the other patrons decide to join me. I said "police?" to one guy but he shook his head. The woman stormed off, but not before violently emptying the contents of her purse on the street and obliterating a cell phone (not sure if it was hers or his) against the pavement. I held the man back so she could leave, then he forlornly picked up the purse contents and left.
It took a while for the adrenaline to wear off. One of the onlookers later walked by my table and gave me a thumbs up and a "flex" motion. I couldn't understand what he was saying but I assume he was complimenting me as a tough guy. He then showed me his appreciation by shaking my hand and pouring me some beer from his pitcher.
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2 comments:
Good work James, but I have to ask: How are you at remorse?
"One of Hwang's most memorable cases involved an incident with an American serviceman, named Tom. The American and his Korean girlfriend had been waiting for a train, said Hwang, recounting the incident as told by the serviceman. The American was then approached by a Korean man who didn't approve of their being together. Hwang believes the Korean took it as an insult.
"'At that time, Koreans were very angry because a Korean woman was killed by an American soldier,' Hwang says. 'So, they directed their anger toward Tom. The Korean started shouting four-letter (words) at Tom. An argument developed and soon other Koreans assembled (around) Tom. Then a fight broke out between Tom and the Koreans.'
"Tom was arrested for assault because his adversary was badly injured. During the trial, Tom showed no remorse for injuring the Korean, said Hwang. Tom maintained his innocence, arguing self-defense. According to Hwang, a humble show of remorse is important in the Korean judicial system. Tom was sentenced to a year in prison without any promise of abridged sentence for good behavior. Since Tom was a serviceman, he wasn't arrested immediately. However, Hwang was able to help Tom in the Court of Appeals.
"'In Korean courts there is no hope for a lighter sentence without remorse,' says Hwang. 'In appeals court, Tom still didn't show remorse, but I was able to persuade the judge to drop the one year prison sentence in exchange for a 5 million won fine.'"
http://www.koreaherald.co.kr/NEWKHSITE/data/html_dir/2009/07/28/200907280057.asp
Quite a way to thank the people you owe for your country's very existence.
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